Confessions of a Mathematician

Whenever I mention that I specialise in mathematics, there is a familiar chorus of questions. “Mathematics?? Really?”, ”Do you really love mathematics that much?”, “What can you possibly learn more in mathematics?”, “Isn’t it all Sin Cos theta?”. When we usually enquire about someone’s speciality, we do it out of curiosity and rarely laced with confusion. I can see their visualisation of Mathematics, which is a tangled mess of equations, Sin and Cos thetas, crying in class because they couldn't memorise the multiplication table. I can visualise this because it was the same for me once upon a time. Now I know mathematics is anything but rigid and dull. It is a language that helps us understand the patterns, mysteries and the infinite depth of this universe. A subject that is a villain in many students’ lives, and here I am going to start my research journey on it. At least a part of it.

When you are passionate about learning a subject, you understand that after a certain point, you have so much more to learn. That is one of the beauties of learning. You learn, and then you realise you haven’t even scratched the surface. We don’t spend a lot of time wondering about the unlearnt. In school, most subjects I studied had a predictable end somewhere. It was not the same with mathematics. Like fantasy world games, I had to complete one level, wait for a portal to open somewhere to take me to the next level with unknown difficulty and unknown terrains. So I took the integrated BSc-MSc degree in mathematics to crack the highest level. Needless to say, I was blown away by the very first lecture, Real Analysis. I was stunned to unlock a level of mathematics that I didn’t know existed. I understood I knew absolutely nothing of the universe I exist in.

When I was introduced to classes of Abstract Algebra, Real Analysis, and Complex Analysis, I realised the understanding of these subjects was directly proportional to my level of imagination. Someone had already imagined the dimension where imaginary numbers existed and how they behaved by correlating the characteristics of the real numbers. Someone already imagined a way to segregate the numbers with certain properties that will go on to be used as a critical part of encryptions. The correlation between all topics is beautifully woven into one cloth that is our universe. I needed 5+ years to even get that image in my head. In front of that, I can only hope to make a single stitch on this grand design.

After a certain point, I saw mathematics everywhere I looked. It was as plain as seeing the sky is blue, but not blue all the time. Seeing that the grass is green, but not just one green, but different shades of green. Each symphony has the right permutation and combination of all the notes. Each convenient design is the result of an equation.  Each pixel is programmed into a matrix. Each heartbeat propagated as a wave. Life, in essence, was written by mathematics.

So yes, I specialise in Mathematics. The hidden language of the universe. Who wouldn't want to learn how to read and speak it?